Sending the first message on an online dating site or app is something of an art form. Not like a proper art where people will pay you money to be near it but one that if approached correctly can result in a member of the opposite sex genuinely wanting to see you naked. So, actually it’s better than proper art.
Despite my brain knowing this though, my first-message game needs a lot of work. So I asked some of my female human expert friends to critique a bunch of actual first messages I’d sent some ladies on the online dating app, OKCupid.
Why? Because this ever burning tyre-fire of a life of mine could always use more fuel, and I’m all about sharing the wisdom.
So, who did I manage to wrangle up?
Alex Sim-Wise is a journalist and presenter and has covered just about everything there is to cover on relationships and sex and can currently be found on Patreon where she does stuff for money.
Stephanie Soh is AskMen’s very own Staff Writer and has to put up with me moping around the work kitchen when a girl hasn’t messaged me back.
Natalie Spear is probably my oldest mate and has witnessed every single one of my ultimately failed relationships.
Sarah Morgan is an extremely funny comedy writer who sometimes pretends to laugh at my jokes in the pub because she’s nice like that.
Maria Grace is a young adult fiction writer who also happens to be my sister. What could possibly go wrong with that?
So there are the ladies who will now judge the deeply embarrassing and genuine first messages I sent to a bunch of unsuspecting females on OKCupid, trying to convince them to acknowledge my existence.